Opposition

It seems that the harder I try, or the stronger I desire, to have a real change of heart, the more opposition I face. I face depression threatening to overtake me. This depression takes on many forms. Satan is a sly one. He wants me to feel worthless. He wants me to feel like I am stuck in blackness and give up in trying to find the light.

Sometimes it seems like it would be so much easier to just give up. Sometimes I can't see anything but blackness, so wallowing in self-hatred or despair seems so much more welcoming than trying to find my way out of the blackness.

Yesterday, I read in 2 Nephi that "the way is narrow, but it lieth in a straight course before him" and at the end of the road is the gate to heaven. It is sometimes hard to stay on a narrow path, especially when the path has some dark spots where Satan is trying to pull you off. But the path is straight. Think about when you are driving. How much easier is it to get where you have never been if all you have to do is go straight?

God has prepared the way. The way is hard because of Satan, but it's a straight drive. We can make it if we follow the directions he has given us.

If you feel like you want to give up because the opposition is so much, don't. Don't give up. Don't sacrifice your eternal salvation for what seems easier now. If you did, where would you be? You would be in the chains of hell with Satan, who really doesn't care about you: he just wants you to be miserable like him.

Find the light and follow it. If you can't see it, just keep going straight. Pray and read your scriptures. Remember God is only as far away as the distance it is to kneel and pray to Him. Sometimes, He is even closer, you just don't see Him through Satan's blackness.