Today at church, I had this feeling that I need to wrap up step 3 and move on to step 4. So, in the next couple of days, that's what I will be doing. Tomorrow, we will be privileged to hear from my husband again. Yay :) Then I will wrap up what I have to say about step 3.
I know that trust can be hard. It can seem overwhelming. But, as I have studied different parts of the gospel, it has helped me to trust. The most important thing that has helped me want to trust and to turn my will over to God is studying the Atonement. The more I understand about my relationship with Jesus Christ, the more I desire to follow Him.
I don't feel like I can really say what I want to say about trust today without simply sharing my testimony. I have a really strong testimony of the gospel. I know that Jesus is the Christ. I know that God is my Father. I know that They live, and I know that I can live again. I know that I can live with my husband after this life, and that as we keep the commandments and turn to Jesus Christ, we will be saved. I have a testimony of the plan of salvation. Life is hard. It was meant to be hard. We need opposition or else we couldn't exercise our agency. Even though the trials we face can be really tough, we can choose how we react to those trials. There are many things in life that are out of our control. For me, one of those things is my husband's addiction. I can't control it. Nothing I do can control it. I can control me though. I can choose to try to develop a Christlike character, full of love and humility. I can choose to love my husband through this really hard time in his life. I can choose many things, both good and bad, and ultimately, I can choose my salvation.
I know that when I choose God, I am choosing so many good things in my life. I also know that He is always there for me. He always sends me blessings to help me get through the day. I always have little messages from Heaven telling me that He loves me--I just have to open my eyes to them.
I know that I don't have to do this alone. Jesus Christ suffered for me, and I don't have to be alone. He is always there with open arms, waiting for me to come to Him and lean on Him. He carries me. He lifts me up. When I feel alone in every other place in my life, I can turn to Him because He is always there. He knows how to succor me and lift me up. He has felt my pains, and He loves me.
I know that God loves me. I know that Jesus loves me. This is their church, and it provides the means for me to heal. I am so grateful for this church in my life and for the power of God that has been manifest.
I pray for each of you who are reading this that you can find what you are looking for--peace, healing, etc. You can find it through Christ.